I get stopped a lot when I’m out with the girls. Then I get asked the questions. The same ones, the same responses, the same oohs and ahhs. But I don’t mind. Because I think that, yes, my children are amazing. But today was different. Because today I met someone who actually pitied me for having twins. I’m used to the comments about having my hands full and how I have ‘double trouble’ (insert polite fake laugh here) but this woman strolled right up to my buggy and said “oh you don’t have twins do you? Oh dear”, as if my twins were a contagious disease.
With people’s opinions of multiples, mostly, completely incorrect I wanted to honestly answer the routine questions that I get asked on a daily basis. If you have multiples you might see something of yourself here, if you don’t have multiples or are expecting them then you may get a peek into a multiples life!
Are they really doubly expensive?
Yes! Luckily my twins are identical and so are the same gender, so that they can at least share their clothing. But we have had to get double of a lot of things. There’s the obvious things like double the milk, the food, the rockers, the cots…but then there are things like the pram that was way more expensive than a normal one baby travel system would have been. We need two car seats with two bases. We had to buy a bigger car. We had to move house when the girls got even a little bit bigger and were starting to move around on their own. There are two high chairs, two walkers and double the supply of nappy changing products stocked up to find room for. So I can officially say that yes they are doubly expensive. And then add some more on top.
Are they a handful? Are they double the work?
Have you ever had a teething baby? Double it. And then add some. Have you ever had a baby want all your attention right now or else the world will end? Double it. And then add some. Twins aren’t just double the work. They are way more. Especially when you’re alone. So many people have said that they don’t know how I do it. But it has gotten easier since they hit the six month mark. They are becoming a lot more independent. But each step comes with its own challenges. When I have two going in totally different directions to run after. I wonder how many more bumps and knocks and accidents happen in a multiples household. How many babies fall over while you’re trying to rescue the other from shutting their hand in a door? Uugghhh. Exhausting.
Were they natural?
Firstly, why would anyone think it’s appropriate to ask strangers how you conceived your children? Then come the encore questions to this one. Do you have twins in the family? Yes. Did you know you were having twins? Yes. We had scans. Like most people. We could see them. Did you want twins? Honestly, if I’d been asked to choose between one or more babies I would have picked one. I was a person who would delete a twin on The Sims so I could just concentrate on one baby at a time. But that was before I met them. Now I wouldn’t change it for all the world. And yes, by the way, the twins were natural. And a surprise. A beautiful, exhausting, expensive surprise.
It may sound a lot like complaining but anyone who has multiples, or even just a baby to be fair, will know how much joy and love and amazing moments overshadow all the downsides. My girls have just started to play together and want to interact with each other. Every stage brings new things that making having twins special and I can’t wait until they can really start to build that bond with each other properly. A lot of people have said how they would love twins and about how magical it must be without ever seeing or realising the behind the scenes struggles. I don’t want people to be naive about living with peas but I also never want to be pitied about them. They are a handful. But they are my handful. And I happen to think that they’re pretty awesome!